Bright Yellow World

So I already talked about the wedding-related things that are Really Super Important to us. There is, of course, also a whole array of things which, to us, Totally Completely Utterly Do Not Matter At All.

Now.

I am guaranteed to offend someone with this list. Please be advised: I do not think any of these things are stupid, bad, unnecessary to the universe at large, or wasteful. I’m just saying that they don’t matter to us. The Horse Whisperer and I don’t consider the following items to be a priority, but that does not mean that you shouldn’t. Nor does it mean that we don’t love experiencing these things at other peoples’ weddings.

Whew. I hate disclaimers. But… you know.

Aaaaanyway, here’s a list of the things that are at the bottom of the priority list, or have already been cut entirely:

1. A Limo/fancy getaway car. I don’t give two flips about cars. Why would I care about them for my wedding?
2. Traditional wedding cake. I like cake. I think cake is delicious. But I also like pie. And cookies. And lemon tarts. So we’ll probably a variety of all of the above, and save a few hundred dollars on a fancypants multi-tiered cake.
3. Save The Dates. Dudes, I love stationary. I love beautiful paper. I love postcards, and I love getting Save The Dates from other people. But… I honestly don’t think that many of my relatives would understand the point. I think some of them might even be offended. Once we set a date, I’ll send an email to tech-savvy folks and call my grandparents. Southerners are excellent at spreading news by word-of-mouth.
4. Guest favors. I would love to make mini jars of jam for my guests. But if time and money start to look tight, that’ll be the very first thing off the list.
5. Videography. I hate seeing myself on moving film. I love photos. I will pony up for photos, but hell no on the video.
6. I hate to say it, but… Open Bar. We will have wine, beer, and maybe even champagne. That gives people plenty of options, without running up the enormous expense of having every type of liquor in the world. Plus, I have Southern Baptist grandparents. I don’t want everyone else to have to attend a totally dry wedding just to make them happy, but I think having an enormous, hulking bar full of 800 varieties of the Blood of Satan might be pushing their comfort level.

Lest this sound like the Least Fun Wedding Ever, there are plenty of things we will have. But I’m going to save that list for another day!

That’s one of my favorite Lou Holtz-isms: What’s Important Now?

Having given myself some decompression time, I am starting to feel much more sane and logical about wedding planning. There are a few realities that I managed to completely overlook for the first few weeks of wedding planning, and those realities made this entire situation seem more doable. For example, my parents have generously offered to help us with the expenses. HW’s family has offered to handle the flowers. I can sew, and my mom can SEW. I have planned multi-million dollar parties for work in the past, so this should feel like a cakewalk… albeit a far more personal cakewalk. Also? I don’t want a lavish, formal wedding.

I can totally do this.

The first step is figuring out what we want. There are a lot of resources out there that tell you what you ostensibly “need,” and we just don’t buy into that philosophy. As far as we’re concerned, what we need are the following things:

Me
HW
An officiant
Our families

When you look at that list, suddenly the act of getting married doesn’t seem that complicated. Everything else is just a bonus! But even though that brief list shows the necessary elements, there are definitely some other things that we’d like to include.

1. We’d like to have our friends and extended families included. We would especially love our many wonderful grandparents to be present.
2. We would like to have fun! We want our wedding day to feel like a big family reunion, bringing together all of the people that we love.
3. We’d like to have our wedding in a beautiful and comfortable setting, preferably in or around my hometown.
4. I would like to wear a wedding dress of some permutation, and the Horse Whisperer would like to wear a suit.
5. We would feel so honored to have our closest lifelong friends standing next to us.
6. We would love to have beautiful photos to look back on when we are 90 years old.
7. The Horse Whisperer would like a photo of the two of us with a cow.
8. We would love to have tasty-but-fun food to share with our guests.

Those are the priorities. (I am not kidding about item 7, by the way.) We’re pretty sure we’ve found a setting for this shindig, but are stuck waiting until my small town’s Super Gigantic University Football Schedule is announced, which should be within the next few weeks. After that, we’ll be ready to hit the ground running.